It’s right there, in the last five or six editions of the
Kamikaze Copy Sins.
Experience as both
noun and verb. Overused to the point of
invisibility. Passive, weak verb. But mostly -
Lazy.
Caught a new Lexus spot.
I’m a soft-core gear head. Just
brought home the latest Car and Driver. Car spots should catch my eye – and ear.
This one, for a luxury sport model, put me to sleep. Until I caught this, buried in the middle of monotone VO: experience amazing.
That’s not a line. It’s
a lost opportunity.
It's close to being a line everyone else will wish they wrote. The Kamikaze Copy Sin Experience kills it.
Prospect Centric
copy does more than talk about the product.
Prospect Centric copy is haiku.
Visual. Active. Evocative. Memorable if not visceral. With a
twist. Without losing the life centric
vernacular of your prospect.
What is visual active evocative memorable if not visceral about
the word (verb or noun) Experience? Swear to all I believe, thought that word went out with poke-your-eye-out shoulder pads, Who shot JR and the 1980s.
Kamikaze Copy is a constant act of translating the
thought. Experience is the thought. Not a haiku quality translation capable of
putting seats in seats.
Work this – and every – line/s like a headline.
Experience amazing (Like amazing as something other than a
modifier):
Live amazing (active)
Ride amazing (Ehhhh expected)
Drive amazing (overused)
immerse yourself in amazing (sounds nice but lacks
performance, maybe a bit clunky)
slip into amazing (luxury/skews female)
sink into amazing (luxury)
surround yourself in amazing (sounds like interior, not what's under hood)
be amazing (getting to driver’s ego/want/sex center, but
lazy verb)
live amazing (sounding better)
amaze yourself (hmmm)
amazing live (interesting)
amazing lives (better)
four wheels of amazing (not loving it, but maybe something to play with)
transform amazing (interesting, not quite but maybe a new
track to work)
amazing transformed (much better – this stuff is addictive once
you get going. Notice what flopping the words did. Play some more. If you're not having fun, go back to law school).*
Experience amazing.
Just because a word is easy, says it and is understood doesn’t
mean it’ll motivate your Prospect. The whole
point of Prospect Centricity – why it’s so powerful – is injecting your
concept/copy/content into the fabric of that Prospect’s life.
Take another look at my very quick list of line runs. (Superstar creative and Kamikaze Mentor Nick
brought me five-eleven single spaced pages of a single line/idea every
week. nickcade.com – he came out well.)
Yes, it’s only body copy – but don’t you want that body copy
to resonate? With the client’s/product’s
prospect – and yours (award show judges, anyone looking at your book).
Which line would you rather your Prospect sees? A line that says it, structured to mimic
someone’s ignorantly perceived language of the luxury sports Prospect?
Or one that speaks in a magical, ego/dream
reaching tongue they cannot ignore?
Experience is a
major Kamikaze Copy Sin.
To avoid these kinds of KC Sins, translate
the thought. Concept very line –
headline, subhead, body copy and close - as memorable visual evocative
motivational and well structured as your headline.
Write every line for your client’s inner Prospect. You’re writing every line for that dream
shop CD, too.
Now look at you book.
How many lost opportunities do you see?**
*No, I never got to “fantastic! That's it!” But that was less than five minutes of lines. If it was my job, I’d still be playing with
it.
**You may want to check my posts on ad haiku before you run
your next line(s). Should make a big
difference.
This post, along with
everything else, ©2018, Doreen Dvorin/Kamikaze Creative
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